Dear Friends and Colleagues,
As often happens with this newsletter, a question or
response from a reader on one issue sows the seeds for
the next. And so it is with the beautiful query from a
career counselor on the east coast of Canada:
“Denise, I found your June newsletter on Intuitive
Wisdom intriguing and inspiring. It is a subject I would
like to know more about in my attempts to help
individuals who are in the midst of difficult life and
career choices. It appears to me, however, that most of
us rarely get to that place you wrote about where we can
hear the wisdom of our own hearts and souls. We are too
wrapped up with the world outside of us to really tune
into what’s going in within us. What advice do you have
for people in transition to increase their capacity to
hear the spiritual and intuitive wisdom that resides at
the center of their being?”
Many of last month’s responses mirrored the same
challenge of how to gain access to the wisdom of our
hearts and souls amidst the noise and chaos of our busy,
overcommitted, overextended lives. I found this question
both important and formidable enough to beg time from
the respondent so as to treat it with the care and
attention it deserves. For me, the heart of the issue is
this: How do we bring a sense of the sacred into our
everyday lives so that we can live from a soulful place,
naturally responding to the wisdom at our depths instead
of looking outside ourselves for answers?
I worked deeply with this question in my book, “The
Wholehearted Journey” as you would know from its
subtitle, “Bringing Qualities of Soul to Everyday Life
and Work”. There are many who would equate soulful
living with the meditative life – a quiet existence
spent in deep contemplation and prayer. And while I
would agree that solitude, prayer and meditation do
invite soulful presence, we should not limit ourselves
to this single way of invitation. Making soup, walking
in a forest, engaging in meaningful conversation,
working in the garden or at the pottery wheel, playing
with a child or caring for an elder – these, too, are
doorways to soulful living if we enter into them with
qualities of spirit. Below I offer a brief overview of
the some simple, practical suggestions I make in “The
Wholehearted Journey” about bringing qualities of soul
to everyday life and work:
1. Erase the boundaries between living in the world
and being connected to the soul.
If we wish to receive the gifts of intuitive wisdom
in an on-going way, we need to live in a soulful way, in
which we keep an on-going connection to our inner
knowing. The soul doesn’t work like the internet. You
can’t just dial it up, go to the “wisdom site,” plug in
key words for it to respond to, then disconnect from it
once it has served your purposes. In the same way that
we can only reap the rewards of a satisfying friendship
by being in relationship with another person, without an
intimacy and a connection to soul, how can we expect to
reap the rewards of the wisdom it holds for us? Rather
than treat the soul as an object to be known or a number
to be rung up, what if we were to treat it as the very
ground beneath our capacity to understand anything, the
totality within which we live, move and experience our
being?
It is not uncommon in our culture to compartmentalize
the spiritual side of our lives and separate it from the
material, earthly aspects of our lives such as making a
living, running a business, or responding to the
pressures of hearth and home. We have come to believe
that the needs of the body, relationships, money,
family, community, and politics are somehow
“unspiritual” and not relevant to issues or qualities of
the soul. We divide the world so that part of it is seen
as exempt from holiness and, as such, our experiences
remain compartmentalized. This boundary is unnecessary
and detrimental to a life plugged into one’s inner
knowing and connected to a sense of the divine.
Where better than in the text of our lives are we to
look for revelation of the sacred? If we are to discover
meaning in our lives, it must be discovered here and
now, in the midst of living them. It is easy to enter
into the silence and serenity of soul when in the
sanctuary, the temple or the mosque, but how about in
the office, the job club, the classroom, or the laundry
room? With the gift of conscious attention to the
‘spirit’ with which we approach everyday tasks, is it
not possible to bring qualities of the soul and a spirit
of ceremony to everything we do?
2. Stay connected to soul by embodying the qualities
it inspires.
I think part of the problem with living soulfully is
that the very concept of soul is shrouded in mystery,
defies definition, and/or is imbued with religious
overtones which can sometimes serve to separate rather
than connect us to this vital life force. What I have
found immensely helpful in my own fledgling relationship
to soul is to recognize it in its far less intimidating
form – in the spiritual qualities it inspires us to
practice. For what are joy, tolerance, justice and
forgiveness if not the embodiment of soul? While we
cannot pinpoint its location or take an x-ray of the
soul, we know and feel its presence through the
expression of tenderness shown to a child or an elder,
patience in a trying situation, compassion extended to
one less fortunate, discernment in making critical
decisions, acceptance of less than pleasing
circumstances, and gratitude for everyday blessings. We
give voice and expression to the powers of soul through
the simple practice of fairness, devotion, sincerity and
authenticity. I believe that each of us carries the
seeds of every spiritual quality at all times, but they
must be awakened and called upon in order to be
expressed; they must be developed like muscles, by being
exercised.
Just as there are physical symptoms of health and
illness – blood pressure, heart rate or energy level –
we have an inner compass that tells us whether we are
moving in the direction of the soulful or dispirited
life. There are certain qualities that lead us in the
direction of a life lived from the center of our being
such as wonder, compassion, purposefulness or hope.
Conversely, there are other qualities that lead us in
the direction of a dispirited life – like boredom,
apathy, resentment or indifference. Every circumstance
in life calls us to practice certain spiritual qualities
- every situation, no exceptions. The question is
whether we are tuned into and willing to don the garment
of soul being called for or if we fall back on the
habits (originally meaning ‘garment’) of the ego, the
personality, or the particular mood coloring our
emotions. One way of staying connected to soul in
everyday life is by asking the question, “Which virtue(s)
is my soul asking me to exercise in my life today (this
week, this month, etc.)?” While we might not always
enjoy the answer, I think we will find it that it is
readily available with the asking of the question.
3. Establish or recommit to a daily practice that
reminds you how you wish to live.
Every spiritual tradition suggests regular discipline
and continuing practices to cleanse us, steady us, and
remind us of what is true and what is important. That is
the gift of a practice or a discipline - it can serve as
a compass on the otherwise stormy seas of regular life.
Amidst the distractions, clutter and pressures that
greet us daily at home and at work, an honorable
practice or a trustworthy discipline can keep us
connected to the center of our being and remind us to
embrace the life we are living with an open heart,
creative imagination, or any quality of the soul with
which we wish to greet the day.
I am not suggesting that we all take up Yoga,
meditate daily, or attend daily mass or church services,
although such practices may appeal to certain readers.
What I am suggesting, however, is that we find some
moment in our day when we can turn our attention to our
inner lives and perhaps even use ordinary activities and
habits as opportunities for developing a soulful
discipline that reminds us of the truer life we want to
live. The particular gesture or practice is not
important, it is the repeating of it and one’s
dedication to it that lends it power.
In “The Wholehearted Journey” I suggest turning an
everyday habit like putting on ones’ shoes into a ritual
by asking “What do I want to walk in today? Hope and
enthusiasm? Purpose and commitment?” The mere asking of
this question while stepping into your shoes can totally
transform the quality of your day because you are
grounding yourself in deep intent, sourcing your day
from a place of soul.
With discipline we can develop the most simple of
practices so that we remember who we are and why we are
here. As Wayne Muller wisely reminds us in his wonderful
book, How Then Shall We Live?, “The heart of most
spiritual practice is simply this: Remember. Remember
who you are. Remember what you love. Remember what is
sacred. Remember what is true. Remember that you will
die, and this day is a gift. Remember how you wish to
live.”
4. Go to the forest.
There is a wonderful Chasidic story about the child
of a rabbi who used to wander in the woods. At first his
father let him wander, but over time he became
concerned. The woods were dangerous. The father did not
know what lurked there. He decided to discuss the matter
with his child. One day he took him aside and said, “You
know, I have noticed that each day you walk into the
woods. I wonder, why do you go there?” The boy said to
his father, “I go there to find God.” “That is a very
good thing,” the father replied gently. “I am glad that
you are searching for God. But, my child, don’t you know
that God is the same everywhere?” “Yes, said the boy,
“but I am not.”
We need to make the time and space in our lives in
which we can conceive, renew, embrace and enchant the
life we want to be living. As I wrote in last month’s
issue, “the soul is always there like a great sun hidden
behind the clouds of our being…it always speaks to us,
but we are not always listening.” But like the boy who
must go to the forest in order to hear the voice of God,
we, too, might benefit by identifying the times, places
and spaces where we most naturally and effortlessly hear
the voice of our inner knowing. Rather than try to
capture the voice of soul, what if we allowed the soul
to capture us?
If it is true that the soul shows up and expresses
itself through spiritual qualities such as peacefulness,
generosity, joy, truth and authenticity, what if we were
to simply identify and align ourselves with the
conditions, contexts or circumstances in which we are
naturally inspired to embody these qualities? Use the
following seven questions to identify the multitude of
ways to “find and go to the forest” in your everyday
life:
- In what situations do you feel a natural affinity
to others, where you need not explain yourself, and in
whose company you feel utterly accepted, encouraged and
understood?
- What circumstances, contexts or situations tend to
bring out your truest colors, where you feel totally in
your element, and at home in the world?
- If you think about what it means to be “authentic”,
what contexts, circumstances or situations invite that
quality in you?
- If you think about what it means to live from a
place of utmost integrity, truth, and sincerity, what
people, places, or spaces inspire those qualities in
you?
- What sights, sounds and sensations in your current
life bring you deep joy, contentment or peace? What
music moves you deeply or puts you in a soulful,
peaceful place?
- What places in nature make you feel most in sync
with the earth? Where in nature brings you to the most
quiet place inside you, where there is little noise or
disruption? What in nature fills you with awe and
wonder?
- What would you consider to be your “holy places”?
Where do you feel the presence of what you consider to
be eternal, sacred and divine?
5. Seek to know your soul so that it can speak to
you.
For years I danced around, sidestepped, and generally
avoided the topic of Soul in my professional writing and
teaching. Feeling utterly unqualified to even approach
such a lofty subject, it seemed the height of arrogance
that I would even attempt to explore something so grand
and mysterious. At some point in my journaling, however,
I remember writing, “If I am the one and only receptacle
of the wisdom granted to my particular soul, doesn’t the
real arrogance lie in not attempting to speak for my
soul, pretending that it doesn’t have a voice? Just
because I cannot know everything about soul, and in
fact, know so very little, does that mean I should
pretend to know nothing?”
That same morning I wrote a list of questions which
included: What do I know of soul? Is it in me or am I in
the soul? Does it care for me or do I need to care for
it? What powers does the soul possess? What power do I
give my soul and what power do I withhold from it? In
what situations and circumstances do I ignite my soul
and hear it speaking to me? What is my soul saying to me
at this particular time of my life? Planting these
questions deep in the soil of my being, I patiently
awaited response. A few days later I awoke with an
urgency to write what I eventually entitled, “Song of
the Soul”. I have included an abbreviated version of the
poem as this month’s selection for Poem of the Month. I
encourage you, dear readers, to engage in a similar
exercise … to ask your soul what it would have you know
at this particular time in your life, and then to
actually anticipate and ready yourself for an answer!
Let us return to the question posed by the career
counselor at the beginning of this issue, “What advice
do you have for people in transition to increase their
capacity to hear the spiritual and intuitive wisdom that
resides at the center of their being?” I feel the fire
of this question in the molten core of my heart as I
face many changes in my life, as I assume may be true
for many of you reading this. And so, I humbly offer
this counsel which I feel personally called to embrace
and put into practice:
That we seek to live from the center of our beings in
all we do and in every aspect of our lives. That when we
need wisdom, clarity and direction, we pledge to embody
the qualities of wisdom, clarity and direction so that
they may call to us from our depths. That when what we
hear is silence and what we experience is emptiness, we
trust that there are gifts to be found in silence and
emptiness too! That we seek to know which of the soul’s
qualities we are being asked to practice – discerning
when it is the patience to wait something out or the
courage to step out on faith. That we use our daily
practices as the solid ground to walk upon. That we
trust in the spiritual maxim “the good that we seek, is
seeking us.” And finally, that we ‘go to the forest’ as
often as possible until we carry the forest within us!
In the great meantime, in all those spaces and places
in our lives in which we feel utterly lost or a bit
confused, or just stumbling along, let us use each
circumstance within our day as the perfect place to
practice purpose, love and meaning. In every role we
play – as parents, partners, customers, neighbors, job
seekers, students, gardeners, artists, counselors,
teachers, social workers, classmates or healers – no
matter how seemingly minor or insignificant the role,
let us be messengers of hope, kindness, and humility. In
so doing, let us play our part in bringing just a touch
more soul into our homes, our workplaces, and into this
wider world!
Wishing you a happy, soulful summer!
~ Denise
© Denise Bissonnette, July 2005 (If not used for
commercial purposes, this article may be reproduced, all
or in part, providing it is credited to "Denise
Bissonnette, Diversity World - www.diversityworld.com."
If included in a newsletter or other publication, we
would appreciate receiving a copy.)
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